That reminds me of a country song...

After spending a couple more days at Sierra's, and traumatizing a few more of her friends, I took her to the the airport at an insane hour of the morning & then headed in the direction of the farm at which Gracie pretends to work. Gracie was nice enough not to inform her sister & brother-in-law that I was coming until about 5 minutes before I showed up. How considerate.

Nathan & Ellen own a grass-fed meat farm, and are just getting started in dairy cows, this part of the operation being Gracie's job. So, I helped her milk cows. All 8 of them. Everyday. With a bucket milker that was made from parts of several kinds of milkers.

So everyday we completely took apart the milker & washed all the parts twice. I washed them first in one sink & then handed them to her to wash in another sink. I don't know why, but for some reason I am unable to wash anything in a sink without getting soaked myself. There were a couple days when I thought Gracie looked like she needed washed as well, and took appropriate measures. I do not know why she was not impressed with my initiative. After washing, we went cow chasing. The fence was rigged about like the bucket milker, so everyday we rounded up the cows from the neighbor's. We attempted to fix the fence & ended up just putting a gate in it so we could get the cows back easier.

Research has proven that cows milk best when you play music, particularly classical, but country ranks as second best. Since we only got one station in the barn & it's country, we played it while we milked. And I swear, we heard the same 20 songs every day. The station liked to brag that we found the one station that plays the best & most music, so I yelled at the radio that we found the one station...PERIOD. And, it is true, folks: there is a country song for any situation in life.

For example: I was really missing my bike, but it was "stuck in colder weather, maybe tomorrow will be better..."
Actually, the whole reason for mentioning this is so that when Gracie reads this, she can "have that song in her head all day, yeah."

We spent a couple days fixing fence on the main farm with Ellen, during which Gracie managed to get burned to a crisp, while I managed to get a tan. She also tried to cut off her finger; she is quite talented. I suggested that I stitch it back in place, but she turned me down, preferring instead to complain about it constantly.

As mentioned before, I was missing my bike. Gracie, however just bought one, but it was 2 hours away. We were nice enough to wait until Lauren the Sister was available for abducting so we could bring her to the farm, too. We drove the two hours on Saturday night after milking, during which we listened to anything but country, yelled at drivers going way under the speed limit, and called the cops on a herd of jaywalking horses. We arrived without further incident however & I ate ice cream, licked out the bowl, and decorated the ceiling fan, to mention a few things. Ceiling fans are so boring with out appropriate streamers, don't you think? Apparently, Lauren didn't think so, she removed them. Lame.

The next day dawned perfectly frigid with periods of rain. Of course. We headed back to the farm in the afternoon; Lauren & I took the car while Gracie froze solid on the bike. Poor thing looked like a statue in black leather when we pulled over at a gas station to watch her warm up. And then, it stayed cold for a few days afterward, simply to spite us. By the way, Gracie got a bigger bike than mine, but you should know that I have handled this with utmost maturity.

Anyways, despite the fact that we were convinced that a freak, indefinite ice age had occurred, it did eventually warm up. And when it did, we went riding; it was downright amazing. She even let me ride it. It was amazing. For...like...a whole hour. Did I mention it was amazing? The weather was perfect and I discovered that Gracie has friends that are good at buying food. Three cheers for responsible, generous people with normal jobs!

So, speaking of food...apparently, I have lived a deprived life. I mean...I had never even heard of a hushpuppie, much less eaten one! Shock. And...I had never had real Tex-Mex food! Gasp. How could I have made it this far alive?!? Well, folks, just so you can sleep tonight, I've been properly introduced to these as well as green tomato relish, elk chili, sweet tea from a mason jar & other stuff not necessarily particular to the South.

Speaking of green tomato relish, everyday we drove past a graveyard on our way to the dairy. Everyday I thought about sleeping in it. I love sleeping in random, weird places, and graveyards are one of my favorites. I mentioned the idea to Gracie & she thought it was a good idea, of course. We never actually got around to doing it, but here is what I'm sure would have happened, given our luck: We would have fallen fast asleep. The next morning, we would have been suddenly awakened by a little, old, southern lady with flowers in hand, coming to grieve at her husband's grave, which happens to be the one we are sleeping next to. Yep. Or, it would have poured down rain in the middle of the night. I'm sure of it.

Anyways, I left TX with the promise of a couple-day -job in MS & plans for heading home-ward. After all, "I have a gypsy soul to blame, and I was born for leaving..."